Holiday Greetings from the Legal Department

Please accept, with no obligation, implied or implicit, the best wishes of the Legal Department (sometimes hereinafter referred to as the "wisher") for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your
choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all, and a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2008, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great, (not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only "America" in the western hemisphere or that there are not other hemispheres of equal dignity), and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wishee (or lack thereof with regards to any or all of such factors) (and further not to imply that the winter should be considered a holiday for those afflicted, through no fault of their own, with some form of psychological or physical depression occasioned by the natural reduction of sunlight or increase in precipitation due to seasonal factors (or increase/reduction for those in the so-called Southern Hemisphere.))

(By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/him or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the
sole discretion of the wisher. Terms are subject to change without notice. Do not remove this disclaimer under penalty of law).

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